Dad-to-be needs baby/infant Advice

[snakeblitz33]

Hey all,
So, I know that there are probably other forums for this kind of thing, but I feel the most comfortable here amongst my friends. As many of you know, my wife and I are having a little baby girl named Emma Grace this coming March around the middle of the month. I'm pretty nervious and anxious about the whole thing. I'm ready to be a dad, and can't wait. Though, I do have many, many, many questions for already well seasoned moms and dads out there that are willing to give me any advice.
I have read a couple of books about babies and infants, and kind of have the jist of everything, but I'm pretty sure there are things that the books don't tell you. So, as I go along and have questions here and there, I would really like to get some honest feedback, advice, and maybe even an anecdote here and there of your experiences.
First of all, the biggest question I have, that I can't seem to find in any book is...
I'm a man, and I'm having a daughter. What's the best public restroom etiquette to follow? Are there rules for this sort of thing?
Do you all have any tips and tricks for taking care of a newborn the first month?
Do you all have any tips and tricks for keeping yourself in shape after baby arrives?
Is there anything ya'll wish you would have done or started before baby arrived?
If you could do something to help your baby out in the long run, what would it be?
Any general tips and advice?

 

[travelerjp98]

Haha.... you know that if I could help you... I would...

 

[cmonti]

Pre baby's, I had 2 tanks. Now, I have 1. Ha. Check out a book called "Baby Wise" My wife read it and was able to get the baby on a consistent sleeping schedule/routine. We followed the book for our first, who is now 2. He still naps the same time everyday and has the same bedtime. It really helps both him and us not lose our minds. An overtired kid is the worst..

 

[morgan175]

Bathroom. Well always took my daughter in with me till she was 7 or so i guess. Weird people out there and I don't trust anyone. She will let you know. Each child is different just be there for them and listen. I tell my wife its my job to mess them up and yours to fix them.

 

[gemmy]

Quote:
Originally Posted by SnakeBlitz33 http:///t/389001/dad-to-be-needs-baby-infant-advice#post_3434384
Hey all,
So, I know that there are probably other forums for this kind of thing, but I feel the most comfortable here amongst my friends. As many of you know, my wife and I are having a little baby girl named Emma Grace this coming March around the middle of the month. I'm pretty nervious and anxious about the whole thing. I'm ready to be a dad, and can't wait. Though, I do have many, many, many questions for already well seasoned moms and dads out there that are willing to give me any advice.
I have read a couple of books about babies and infants, and kind of have the jist of everything, but I'm pretty sure there are things that the books don't tell you. So, as I go along and have questions here and there, I would really like to get some honest feedback, advice, and maybe even an anecdote here and there of your experiences.
First of all, the biggest question I have, that I can't seem to find in any book is...
I'm a man, and I'm having a daughter. What's the best public restroom etiquette to follow? Are there rules for this sort of thing?
Do you all have any tips and tricks for taking care of a newborn the first month?
Have lots of caffeine on hand. Don't forgot about mom. The first couple of months are very rough for her. Her hormones will be going crazy and to top it off she has to tend to a new born. Be the one to get up during the middle of the night. Be supportive. There will be times when the baby can't be soothed, and you have to remember to stay calm. The baby can pick up on your tension and that will make her feel uneasy. Once again don't forget about mom.
Do you all have any tips and tricks for keeping yourself in shape after baby arrives?
Make it a point to stay active. Go on hikes on the weekends. Get a good exercise routine going now and do not deviate from it when the baby comes.
Is there anything ya'll wish you would have done or started before baby arrived?
N/A
If you could do something to help your baby out in the long run, what would it be?
Any general tips and advice?
I don't have a kid, but I have 10 nieces/nephews and 3 god-children. I helped raise my oldest niece and I am the go to babysitter in the family. If you can afford it, I would recommend a weekend getaway with mom around the 6 month mark (an area within driving distance, but special to you two). Make it a romantic trip just about the two of you. It might be the last time you can get away for a bit.
See everything I typed in red, forget about it. The best thing to remember is this is you and your wife's child. Remember that. People are going to tell you how to raise your child, and just let it go in one ear and out the other. There are no mistakes just learning experiences (unless you do something completely stupid).

 

[beth]

As for the bathroom, start scouting out for the "family bathroom" in areas that you might be visiting with your baby which is where you will able to go and take care of everything that needs to be done. Otherwise, mom will pretty much need to go to the lady's bathroom with your daughter to visit the baby changing station.
If there is no family bathroom,and you and your daughter are on your own, then plan to make trips back and forth from your car as needed. LOL Carry handiwipes and grocery store plastic bags everywhere.

 

[bubblegurl]

Enjoy every moment! Wishing for her to crawl, walk, talk, start school, it goes by fast so don't wish it away. Remember like Gemmy said, your wife and her you. You need to put each other first, continue to "date". You will grow as a parent as your daughter grows, don't worry about the what ifs years before you get there! And routine is important for everyone, especially sleep, but do what works for your family, look after your wife and just enjoy! I have 2 daughters and they are the best things I ever did! But it's not always easy, I live a day at a time.
Relax, you will be a great dad, I don't even know you but here you seem like a kind, compassionate man. Enjoy the pregnancy too!

 

[mantisman51]

I took my daughters in with me until about 7 or 8. I would cover their eyes(I know I'm paranoid) until I got them in the stall. I am a lanky and uncoordinated guy, so I held my babies very little in their first 3 months. I was always afraid I'd drop them. You ought to see me try to carry a 44 oz Big Gulp, then you'd understand. I never did get comfortable changing my daughter's diapers. Do you wipe up or down and how hard to you clean? I mean, come on, I'm a guy. Plumbing is supposed to be external and rugged! I took thousands of pictures and have enough 8mm video to stock a library. Now that my youngest is 16 and my oldest is 22, I'm glad I did. Your child will have mannerisms and quirks that make you laugh hard and want to remember after she's grown out of it.

 

[teresaq]

Quote:
Originally Posted by SnakeBlitz33 http:///t/389001/dad-to-be-needs-baby-infant-advice#post_3434384
Hey all,
So, I know that there are probably other forums for this kind of thing, but I feel the most comfortable here amongst my friends. As many of you know, my wife and I are having a little baby girl named Emma Grace this coming March around the middle of the month. I'm pretty nervious and anxious about the whole thing. I'm ready to be a dad, and can't wait. Though, I do have many, many, many questions for already well seasoned moms and dads out there that are willing to give me any advice.
I have read a couple of books about babies and infants, and kind of have the jist of everything, but I'm pretty sure there are things that the books don't tell you. So, as I go along and have questions here and there, I would really like to get some honest feedback, advice, and maybe even an anecdote here and there of your experiences.
First of all, the biggest question I have, that I can't seem to find in any book is...
I'm a man, and I'm having a daughter. What's the best public restroom etiquette to follow? Are there rules for this sort of thing? A lot of stores now have family restrooms and some even have changing stations in the mens room. Besure to always have a changing pad with you. Now if you are talking about when she gets older, then a lot will depend on your child. My son is almost 6 and he still goes in with me.
Do you all have any tips and tricks for taking care of a newborn the first month? New borns are pretty easy, They eat, sleep, pooo. lol Hold them when they are awake, and let them sleep when they sleep. Dont try to keep everything quite. Most babies can sleep thru anything.
Check out Dr Brown bottles. These help keep gas at bay.
Most babies have a fussy time, a time when nothing will sooth them. Dont be afraid to put the baby to bed and let them cry. I know its heart breaking at times, but they can feel what you feel. If you are upset, they will be upset.
Do you all have any tips and tricks for keeping yourself in shape after baby arrives?
Is there anything ya'll wish you would have done or started before baby arrived?
If you could do something to help your baby out in the long run, what would it be?
Any general tips and advice?

 

[snakeblitz33]

So, so far, I'm hearing:
Use family restrooms, definitely get a changing pad... diaper bag and the essentials
Stick to a routine, be it sleep, exercise, cleaning etc.
Add a little romance

 

[snakeblitz33]

I know I'll mess up along the way,... no doubts about it.
Oh, and Bubble - thank you especially for those kind words about my demeanor. It seems like every time I turn around I'm called rude, crass and arrogant here and there. That really makes me feel good. Thank you for that. Oh, and you're like the third person ever to call me a man, lol. That in itself is an awesome compliment. Thank you for that.

 

[gemmy]

You're missing the 2 most important pieces of advice (IMO).

 

[bubblegurl]

I'm trying to remember my girls being new, oh, new babies usually have days and nights mixed up, can take a week or two before they straighten out, don't panic about it, as long as your wife sleeps when she does.
I think Snake you are passionate about this hobby, as most are. I've realized this is a written place to exchange ideas and typed words don't convey emotions the way we think they do. You've been kind and helpful to me since I joined here and I've appreciated it! Besides, your daughter will melt your heart and you will do your best to be her dad, it happens!

 

[bender77]

I'm an aunt and have no children, but take advantage of your baby's aunties when they offer to watch them. We truly want to spend time with the little one. Then you and your wife can do whatever you need whether it be a nap, a date or grocery shopping. I babysat for 3 days while my brother and his wife painted their new house and enjoyed every minute. Use help when you need a break. It really helps

 

[snakeblitz33]

My brother lives 14 hours away and my three sister-in-laws are alcoholic drug abusers... I don't think I'm going to trust em' with my baby. lol But, good advice. My mother in law and my mother have offered to help when they can. We also have a couple of (older) friends that we trust to watch her for a little bit too who have also volunteered. My wife will be a month and a half away from her college graduation when the baby comes.... It's going to be hard, but I'm sure it will all work out and be just fine.

 

[bender77]

I live in st Louis Missouri and my brother in Connecticut, I make special trips lol. But yes, take advantage of offers to watch her with people you trust. You are going to be a great dad.

 

[btldreef]

Good advice you've been given, so I'll touch on some money savers:
Learn how to make your own baby food. It's incredibly easy and will cost much less. For example, one jar of Gerber sweet potatoes will run you .75-$1.00 depending on the store, while 1 sweet potato microwaved or boiled and then placed in a blender will run you about the same price, but you'll get 3-5x as much out of it. Freeze what you don't use. Usually 2 frozen ice cubes (from the standard cube tray) of baby food is the equivalent to one regular jar. You'd me amazed at how much cheaper it is, and then you know exactly what you've fed your child. Friends of mine did this wIth many of their baby food except for a few that are difficult to make at home (like peas) and saved a lot.
Target brand diapers suck, don't waste your $. But the rest of their baby products are awesome.
Have wifey (or you) sign up for the mommy-to-be freebies and free samples online. I have stock piles already and I'm only 17 weeks. Baby companies give a lot away because the general rule is that once you find something that works, you don't try anything else. But heck, why pay for the product while you're trying it out!
And most importantly:
Invest in a large, very large, bottle of Advil/Excedrine and a bottle of your favorite spirits, lol

 

[spanko]

Eat them when they are young and tender, saves time - money - emotional stress later.
JK, you have gotten some good advice here. Enjoy your time with them!!

 

[teresaq]

Luvs diaper and Huggies wipes.
Plain cloth diapers for spitup cloths
Dont buy a lot of shoes and fancy cloths. onesies and sleepers for the first few months.
Dr browns bottles
I agree on the baby food. Get either a magic bullet or a small food processor. You can make your own food much cheaper.
When you have a shower, have everyone bring a pack of diapers for a special door prize. we just did this for my cousin - she had enough size ones for the first three months, and has 2s and threes in reserve. lol

 

[flower]

Well lets see...you have had lots of BABY advice...but that stage is very short.
I watch the Super nanny....if you can, get those on disk and watch them. It's instructions for children. I wish I had a Super Nanny show when my kids were little. I knew what my goals were for what I wanted of my children, but this lady actually has the how toos of getting things done and having a peacful happy home.
I raised 3 children and have 16 grandchildren. Some of the stuff I've learned over the years...
The first 5 years will shape her personality, her self worth and eating habits. Spoiled brats are created, not born. Instead of giving baby Em everything...work on helping her discover the world around her, say things like "what's this?" big words like reflection when looking in a mirror are not lost, it's amazing what intelligent sponges little kids are. Also show her how stuff works... it teach her to expand her mind.

• 
  Children learn what they see YOU and mom do

• , not what you say. So develope those good habits even when baby isn't with you..EXAMPLE: Always cross the street at the cross walks. Eat the right foods, and watch that mouth...not only cursing, but how you talk about others and respond to the world around you.
• 
  Do no let baby sleep in the bed with you, it's a habit you will live to very much regret.
• 
  Don't worry if the little one does not eat everything on the plate, and do not make extra meals so she will eat (not talking babyfood here) have her eat what the family eats.
• 
  Be sure snacks are fruit, not candy bars, and the TV is not a babysitter.
  Oddly, the way others treat you will dictate how the kids view you and her mom. So treat each other with respect and never put each other down. If mom says no, make sure you follow with the same no. Work together as a team, never override a dicision the other has made.
  Grounded means grounded, the time out means the timeout (I minute per year according to Super Nanny) don't let the little run the show, be in control.
  Running lose at public resturants is dangerous (hot food plates and coffee being transported) so teach the little one to stay seated. (sorry, pet peeve)

I am not talking about being a hardnosed disciplinarian. The truth is children want boundaries, it makes them feel secure when they know what is expected of them, and what the rules are. Your child will be a delight to take in public, a joy at home, and will grow up well adjusted.
Always remember, the teen years is just around the corner, you will be so glad you worked as a team at that time. If the pair of you havent worked hard to ingrain important values in Emily's mind as a child, you can't dream of trying to do so then, it will be too little too late....if your child does not respect your opinion and authority as a child, you can kiss goodbye having a say when you warn her about bad boys and drugs.
LOL...I know you are just gathering info trying to waste the time until you can hold that bundle of joy. To be a good dad, you just need to be able to think fast when a situation arrives. Mantisman covering the childs eyes as she is walked to the stall is a perfect example. You are going to be a good dad as long as you keep the same passion of care you show now, all the way through the years. There are plenty of parents that are there in body only, those kids are in trouble.