does anyone remember me?

[jeo]

So it has been about a year and a half since I took my tanks down (going to college was antagonistic to taking care of, paying for, and enjoyiny them). Anyways, someone from this board IMed me yesterday and asked some questions, so that prompted me to come back and say hi. I definitly miss the hobby; I still stop by the aquarium store occasionally to look at fish.
also, funny thing has happened in the past few months. I have fallen in love with a wonderful girl, who is afraid of 2 things 1) graveyards and 2) aquariums!

true story: we went to get chinese food we had change tables because ours was too close (and by close I mean 20 feet) to the aquarium in the front. We moved to the back corner. As we left she ran by it as quickly as possible. I have questioned her exaustivly on exactly what it is that bothers her and I really can't shed much light on it.
anyways, she says that she would want me to have an aqurium if it would make me happy. I was actually thinking of, someday down the road, trying my hand at koi ponds instead, as she is not afraid of ponds

 

[jeo]

no one? :notsure:

 

[kimc]

Maybe, if the two of you together, started a saltwater tank. From picking out the size of the tank to setting it up... watching the cycle, then picking out the great things you will fill the tank with... She may come around... :yes: Anyways, if she could see how much enjoyment you get from saltwater tanks... she may get the itch... (Has she seen finding Nemo????) :joy: Good luck!!

 

[jeo]

yeah, I have actually thought about that, and I think that there is a possibility that if she was involved in setting it up it might not be "scary," but when I told her about my hopes she said she didn't think it would help, but said she would try.

 

[inkman2004]

At least she is willing to try. Sounds like a keeper to me.

 

[reefdude37]

Arnt u glad i IMed u lol

 

[jayc]

Atleast she is willing to give it a try.

 

[jeo]

yeah she is great and said she would never want to prevent me from persuing a hoby that would make me happy. I do have hope that if she saw a beautiful decked out reef aquarium her reaction would be more positive than it is from shady freshwater tanks and chinese resturants.
yeah, thanks for IMing me ReefDude, now you are making me miss the hobby!

thats ok though, I can live vicariously through your tank, just keep me updated with pics and stuff, maybe name one of your fish after me :happyfish

 

[f1shman]

post a picture of her. lol jk. why would she be scaired of fish tanks!? is she scaired of the ocean too?

 

[brian90vette]

dump her. She just wants attention.

 

[jeo]

why is she scared of fish tanks is a good question that I have not really been able to answer even after intense interrogation
this is the imformation that I have aquired. feel free to interprete.
she is not scared of the ocean, ponds, puddles or any other naturally occuring body of water
she is not scared of fish or other aquatic creatures given that they are in their natural enviornment
I have an ecosphere (4" glass sphere with little shirmp that feed off of algae) that she does not find scary
interestingly, she is not scared of lobsters in the tank at the supermarket (this suprised me, as i would find this more displeasing than all but the dirtiest aquariums)
she said the more dimly lit the tank, the dirtier the tank and the more darkly colored and ugly the fish are the scarier the tank is overall (could 500 watts of 10k MH goodness make a tank not scary at all I wonder?)
she said an empty aquarium is not scary, nor an aquarium filled with only water. When I asked about an aquarium with no fish or other creatures yet fully outfitted with filters, gravel and the works she said that might be scary.
I don't know what to tell you!

 

[celacanthr]

geez that is weird. But the human brain is so wierd you may never know .

but maybe she had an incident with a stuffed fish that gave her nightmares and if she can see the fish in full body not just looking down on em that may scare her. Hmmmmm you could try desensitizing her like the suggestion earlier and getting her to help with the seting up and take her to the aquarium or to the lfs but they usually have dirty tanks so that might be scary.
but if all that dousnt work :scared: :happyfish :happy: :scared: Electroshock :scared: :happyfish :happy: :scared:

 

[snailheave]

when she was a kid she was trapped inside an aquarium, during the sumer. she survived because the tank had eggcrate top.
solution: get a tank with eggcrate cover!

 

[sw65galma]

Originally Posted by jeo
why is she scared of fish tanks is a good question that I have not really been able to answer even after intense interrogation
this is the imformation that I have aquired. feel free to interprete.
she is not scared of the ocean, ponds, puddles or any other naturally occuring body of water
she is not scared of fish or other aquatic creatures given that they are in their natural enviornment
I have an ecosphere (4" glass sphere with little shirmp that feed off of algae) that she does not find scary
interestingly, she is not scared of lobsters in the tank at the supermarket (this suprised me, as i would find this more displeasing than all but the dirtiest aquariums)
she said the more dimly lit the tank, the dirtier the tank and the more darkly colored and ugly the fish are the scarier the tank is overall (could 500 watts of 10k MH goodness make a tank not scary at all I wonder?)
she said an empty aquarium is not scary, nor an aquarium filled with only water. When I asked about an aquarium with no fish or other creatures yet fully outfitted with filters, gravel and the works she said that might be scary.
I don't know what to tell you!
I'm thinking there is something she isn't telling you...
Bad experience maybe....that she doesn't want to share..
There is a reason for everything...
Try a small nano...
Does she wear glasses? I know when i sit to close to a tank i get dizzy from the light bending properties of water...

 

[kickedoff2]

Maybe shes scaired that the tank will break when she walks by it and therefore the fish would fly onto her. The only thing I could gather from that is that she is scaired of the water causing the glass to break. But that would make her scaired of the lobster tank as well, but those aren't really "fish" so maybe thats why.
-By the way this is F1shman

 

[fishamajig]

dude
koi ponds are gay
keep reefin

 

[msd2]

I have worked with individuals that have had phobias of all types. Your (in general meaning of the word) looking for a rational explanation or logic around something that is evoking an irrational emotional response, which can be very frustrating for you and painful for her. Instead of testing the limits with this tank or lighting, filters etc I would highly suggest she address the phobia itself. Its great you respect her limits and don't minimize its importance to her. While I am sure you have her best interest in mind by trying to help her look at her phobia but I would suggest her seeking professional help in case their is something more critical as an underlying issue that this phobia stems from.