Bummer Day - December has been rough

[jpc763]

I am having a bad December. On 12/3 my father had a massive heart attack and went into a coma. I flew from Colorado to California and spent the next 2 days with him. My other brothers and sisters all were able to see him before he died on Friday 12/5. I spent the next week helping to plan his funeral and cremation as well as his placement in a niche in Santa Clara.

Today is his birthday. He would have been 82 years old today.

My father has had significant health problems and the fact that he died so peacefully is a blessing. He had bad dementia that had gotten significantly worse in the last 6 months. He couldn't walk anymore due to diabetes and to top it off, he had parkinson's disease. So him being taken was a good thing. It is still hard.
On 12/6, my sister had to put her Cat (Sammie) to sleep. I was staying at her house and this Cat was my cat in college. I gave it to my Sister when my landlord found in the window and threatened to evict me for it. She was almost 22 years. Once again, she lived a great life. Once again it is still hard.
Finally today, my Wife and I made the tough decision to put our beloved dog to sleep. He will be going to heaven tomorrow. He is a white German Shepard and is 14.5 years old. He has not eaten in 3 days and has had problems getting around. We knew it was coming, but was hoping he would make it through Christmas. He was our first child and my wife loves him dearly. He is a kind and gentle dog who does not bark and loves everyone. His name is Bogie.
Thanks for taking the time to listen. If you have a dog, give him a scratch for me. If you have a cat, rub her between the ears for me. If you still have your father, give him a big hug and tell him you love him. When they are gone, you cannot do that anymore.
Thanks, John

 

[ruaround]

sorry man... hang in there... something good is coming your way!!!

 

[jpc763]

Thanks. Talking (or writing) about it helps.

 

[veni vidi vici]

Thank you for sharing that with me John.My heart felt condolences go out to you and yours.I hope and pray that your grieving is short and that you have some good things in life soon ahead.

 

[ruaround]

Originally Posted by jpc763
http:///forum/post/2878579
Thanks. Talking (or writing) about it helps.
indeed it does... and you have a great outlet here with ALOT of awesome people...

 

[jennythebugg]

I hate to hear that you are having such a rough time and I feel for you, you and your family will be in my prayers, and i hope The Lord eases the heaviness on your heart...jenny

 

[liljay0418]

Hang in there man, I feel you, lost my dad to the big C almost 3 years ago (still hard) lost our cat a few years ago ( feline diabeties ) sp. Now my dog is going through some hard times (14 yr. old husky) she has been picking at her food on and off for a few weeks (not really eating) her dog food. But when its dinner time she perks up and will eat table scraps, took her to vet $600 later and was told "shes getting old" so I guess we are holding on til after christmas. I definently feel you.

 

[spanko]

This too will pass my friend. Lean on us and anyone you are comfortable with for support.

 

[cowfishrule]

sux dood.
but you said that it is better this way. i know emotion is a tough thing to wrangle, but as i see it, acceptance is the first step of moving forward.

 

[sharkbait9]

I’m sorry to hear.

 

[girlina4x4]

Im so sorry about everything thats happened to you this month. I just posted this in another thread, but here is a sweet poem about losing a pet:
The Rainbow Bridge
Just this side of heaven is a place called Rainbow Bridge. When an animal dies that has been especially close to someone here, that pet goes to Rainbow Bridge. There are meadows and hills for all of our special friends so they can run and play together. There is plenty of food, water and sunshine, and our friends are warm and comfortable. All the animals who had been ill and old are restored to health and vigor. Those who were hurt or maimed are made whole and strong again, just as we remember them in our dreams of days and times gone by. The animals are happy and content, except for one small thing; they each miss someone very special to them, who had to be left behind. They all run and play together, but the day comes when one suddenly stops and looks into the distance. His bright eyes are intent. His eager body quivers. Suddenly he begins to run from the group, flying over the green grass, his legs carrying him faster and faster. You have been spotted, and when you and your special friend finally meet, you cling together in joyous reunion, never to be parted again. The happy kisses rain upon your face; your hands again caress the beloved head, and you look once more into the trusting eyes of your pet, so long gone from your life but never absent from your heart. Then you cross the Rainbow Bridge together.
-Author unknown

 

[demartini]

sorry for your loss. =( I know how you feel... My grandpa just passed away yesterday.
Your dad's in a better place now =)

 

[jpc763]

Thank you all for your "from the heart" words! I am spending some time with Bogie on the floor just stroking his ears. He will be much more comfortable in the Rainbow Bridge!
Originally Posted by Girlina4x4
http:///forum/post/2878773
Im so sorry about everything thats happened to you this month. I just posted this in another thread, but here is a sweet poem about losing a pet:
The Rainbow Bridge
Just this side of heaven is a place called Rainbow Bridge. When an animal dies that has been especially close to someone here, that pet goes to Rainbow Bridge. There are meadows and hills for all of our special friends so they can run and play together. There is plenty of food, water and sunshine, and our friends are warm and comfortable. All the animals who had been ill and old are restored to health and vigor. Those who were hurt or maimed are made whole and strong again, just as we remember them in our dreams of days and times gone by. The animals are happy and content, except for one small thing; they each miss someone very special to them, who had to be left behind. They all run and play together, but the day comes when one suddenly stops and looks into the distance. His bright eyes are intent. His eager body quivers. Suddenly he begins to run from the group, flying over the green grass, his legs carrying him faster and faster. You have been spotted, and when you and your special friend finally meet, you cling together in joyous reunion, never to be parted again. The happy kisses rain upon your face; your hands again caress the beloved head, and you look once more into the trusting eyes of your pet, so long gone from your life but never absent from your heart. Then you cross the Rainbow Bridge together.
-Author unknown
This was beautiful! Thanks!
Originally Posted by DeMartini
http:///forum/post/2878925
sorry for your loss. =( I know how you feel... My grandpa just passed away yesterday.
Your dad's in a better place now =)
My heart goes out to you and your grandpa. I will pray for him and you.
John

 

[mimzy]

oh John. i'm so, so sorry. My hope for you is that you'll be able to take comfort in all the wonderful memories you have with these beloved members of your family.
And know that you are doing the right thing for Bogie. He has given everything he could to you and your wife, and now is your chance to give him the most precious and difficult gift of all; the gift of release.
You all are in our thoughts. Hang in there.

 

[oceanlover]

So sorry about your Dad. I lost my Mom in December (two years ago) and she too had been battling dementia for a year. Once the quality of life is gone, it is a mercy to the person to move on but it is sure heartbreaking for those of us left behind. One thing that helped me was gathering pictures of her and building her life story. There are lots of places that will take the pictures and make them into a video and add whatever music you want. It was nice to see all of her happy times and all the great things she got to do in her life. You can even have video added with people telling fun stories about them.
I am also so sorry about your pets. Our pets, unfortunately, have shorter life spans than we do. So the price we pay for having such faithful friends is that we hurt when their lives end. Don't be afraid to greive for your pets. You must go through the grieving process to heal.
My Dad died when I was 11 years old. I've always told my kids that when any of our pets die that they go to Heaven with Grandad. Since I'm 54 now and always keep a load of pets, he must have a huge farm of my pets with him!
Take care.

 

[cranberry]

I'm so sorry... that all sounds so horrible and overwhelming.
My dog is not doing to well.... everyday I miss her and she's still here. I look at her, think how much I love her and how much I am going to miss her, and I'm a ball of tears. I hope all goes "well" tomorrow... I have a lump in my throat thinking about it.

 

[carrieabn]

John
I lost my dad almost 3 months ago, it will be 3 months on Christmas Eve and his birthday was Dec.1, he would of been 89. He was in the late stages of alzheimer's disease. I was with him when he died and I'm very thankful that I made it there in time, I had 5 hours to be with him. I know its hard but the hurt will ease over time but those moments will still pop up and get you, dad was on my mind this past weekend all weekend and I cried numerous times. The holidays will be hard, Thanksgiving was weird without him. I'm a daddy's girl, always will be and I know he will always be with me as your dad will be with you.
I've scratched my cat, hugged and kissed my dogs for you and I share you hurt and tears over your dad.

 

[jpc763]

Thanks everyone! Your support is very helpful.
The best part about Dad's passing was all 7 of his kids getting together. We shared stories, cried and all worked tirelessly to make sure my Mom did not have to plan the whole funeral. My Dad was a Pack Rat so helping my Mom go through that stuff was like a treasure hunt from my past. Old pictures, momentos and just junk (he kept old screws and old pins that he found, just in case he found where they went) were a wonderful set of memories. He kept his wedding announcement (52 years) from the paper as well as an invitation. He kept his Catholic Missal from his Graduation year at Santa Clara University. He even kept his Bail Receipt when he was arrested (charges dropped) for bookmaking! I now have copies of all of those things as well as a Virgin Mary medalion that he had.
Thanks again. John

 

[stdreb27]

Well you can look at the bright side, at least you can get a puppy for christmas...

 

[sharkbait9]

uuugh The Rainbow Bridge every time I read that poem i can't help but cry

. I don't know if that poem helps or hurts.
Enjoy the time you have and the time you spent. Its never easy and even though time heals all wounds the memories never go away.
rub that head and enjoy the look they give you.
at least in a time or sorrow everyone was able to get together and help hold each other up and stay strong.
Thoughts and prayers