nflnutswif
Member
I hope this offends NO~ONE but if you have children then I think You'll
understand I know I've been guilty of talking & not listening.
We all know what it's like to get that phone call in the middle of the
night. This night's call was no different. Jerking up to the ringing
summons, I focused on the red illuminated numbers of my clock.Midnight.
Panicky thoughts filled my sleep-dazed mind as I grabbed the receiver.
Hello?" My heart pounded; I gripped the phone tighter and eyed my
husband, who was now turning to face my side of the bed.
Mama?" I could hardly hear the whisper over the static. But my thoughts
immediately went to my daughter. When the desperate sound of a young
crying voice became clearer on the line, I grabbed for my husband and
squeezed his wrist
"Mama, I know it's late, but don't...don't say anything, until I finish.
And before you ask, yes, I've been drinking. I nearly ran off the road a
few miles back, and..."
I drew in a sharp shallow breath, released my husband and pressed my
hand against my forehead. Sleep still fogged my mind, and I attempted to
fight back the panic. Something wasn't right.
"And I got so scared. All I could think about was how it would hurt you
if a policeman came to your door and said I'd been killed. I want...to
come home. I know running away was wrong. I know you've been worried
sick. I should have called you days ago, but I was afraid...afraid..."
Sobs of deep-felt emotion flowed from the receiver and poured into my
heart.
Immediately I pictured my daughter's face in my mind and my fogged
senses seemed to clear. "I think--"
"No! Please let me finish! Please!" She pleaded, not so much in anger
but in desperation.
I paused and tried to think of what to say. Before I could go on, she
continued, "I'm pregnant, Mama. I know I shouldn't be drinking
now...especially now, but I'm scared, Mama. So scared!" The voice broke
again and I bit into my lip, feeling my own eyes fill with moisture. I
looked at my husband who sat silently mouthing, "Who is it?"
I shook my head and when I didn't answer, he jumped up and left the
room, returning seconds later with the portable phone held to his ear.
She must have heard the click in the line because she continued, "Are
you still there? Please don't hang up on me! I need you. I feel so
alone."
I clutched the phone and stared at my husband, seeking guidance. "I'm
here, I wouldn't hang up," I said. "I know I should have told you, Mama.
But when we
talk, you just keep telling me what I should do. You read all those
pamphlets on how to talk about --- and all, but all you do is talk. You
don't listen to me. You never let me tell you how I feel. It is as if my
feelings aren't important. Because you're my mother, you think you have
all the answers.
But sometimes I
don't need answers. I just want someone to listen."
I swallowed the lump in my throat and stared at the
how-to-talk-to-your-kids pamphlets scattered on my night stand. "I'm
listening," I whispered.
"You know, back there on the road, after I got the car under control, I
started thinking about the baby and taking care of it. Then I saw this
phone booth and it was as if I could hear you preaching about people
shouldn't drink and drive. So I called a taxi. I want to come home."
CONTINUED ( text to long)
understand I know I've been guilty of talking & not listening.
We all know what it's like to get that phone call in the middle of the
night. This night's call was no different. Jerking up to the ringing
summons, I focused on the red illuminated numbers of my clock.Midnight.
Panicky thoughts filled my sleep-dazed mind as I grabbed the receiver.
Hello?" My heart pounded; I gripped the phone tighter and eyed my
husband, who was now turning to face my side of the bed.
Mama?" I could hardly hear the whisper over the static. But my thoughts
immediately went to my daughter. When the desperate sound of a young
crying voice became clearer on the line, I grabbed for my husband and
squeezed his wrist
"Mama, I know it's late, but don't...don't say anything, until I finish.
And before you ask, yes, I've been drinking. I nearly ran off the road a
few miles back, and..."
I drew in a sharp shallow breath, released my husband and pressed my
hand against my forehead. Sleep still fogged my mind, and I attempted to
fight back the panic. Something wasn't right.
"And I got so scared. All I could think about was how it would hurt you
if a policeman came to your door and said I'd been killed. I want...to
come home. I know running away was wrong. I know you've been worried
sick. I should have called you days ago, but I was afraid...afraid..."
Sobs of deep-felt emotion flowed from the receiver and poured into my
heart.
Immediately I pictured my daughter's face in my mind and my fogged
senses seemed to clear. "I think--"
"No! Please let me finish! Please!" She pleaded, not so much in anger
but in desperation.
I paused and tried to think of what to say. Before I could go on, she
continued, "I'm pregnant, Mama. I know I shouldn't be drinking
now...especially now, but I'm scared, Mama. So scared!" The voice broke
again and I bit into my lip, feeling my own eyes fill with moisture. I
looked at my husband who sat silently mouthing, "Who is it?"
I shook my head and when I didn't answer, he jumped up and left the
room, returning seconds later with the portable phone held to his ear.
She must have heard the click in the line because she continued, "Are
you still there? Please don't hang up on me! I need you. I feel so
alone."
I clutched the phone and stared at my husband, seeking guidance. "I'm
here, I wouldn't hang up," I said. "I know I should have told you, Mama.
But when we
talk, you just keep telling me what I should do. You read all those
pamphlets on how to talk about --- and all, but all you do is talk. You
don't listen to me. You never let me tell you how I feel. It is as if my
feelings aren't important. Because you're my mother, you think you have
all the answers.
But sometimes I
don't need answers. I just want someone to listen."
I swallowed the lump in my throat and stared at the
how-to-talk-to-your-kids pamphlets scattered on my night stand. "I'm
listening," I whispered.
"You know, back there on the road, after I got the car under control, I
started thinking about the baby and taking care of it. Then I saw this
phone booth and it was as if I could hear you preaching about people
shouldn't drink and drive. So I called a taxi. I want to come home."
CONTINUED ( text to long)
