men...

[jdragunas]

For all those men who say, Why buy a cow when you can get milk for free. Here's an update for you: Now days, 80% of women are against marriage, WHY? Because women realize it's not worth buying an entire pig just to get a little sausage.
Men are like....
1. Men are like ..Laxatives ..... They irritate the crap out of you.
2. Men are like ..Bananas ...... The older they get, the less firm they are.
3. Men are like ..Weather ..... Nothing can be done to change them.
4. Men are like .Blenders ... You need One, but you're not quite sure why.
5. Men are ! like ...Chocolate Bars .... Sweet, smooth, &they usually head right for your hips.
6. Men are like ....Commercials ...... You can't believe a word they say.
7. Men are like Department Stores ..... Their clothes are always 1/2 off.
8. Men are like ........Government Bonds .... They take soooooooo long to mature.
9. Men are like .....Mascara . They usually run at the first sign of emotion.
10. Men are like .Popcorn ..... They satisfy you, but only for a little while.
11. Men are like ........Lava Lamps . Fun to look at, but not very bright.
12. Men are like Parking Spots ....... All the good ones are taken, the rest are handicapped.
hehehe, i thought it was funny...

 

[johnzo]

Most Men Anyway...there aren't many many of us good ones left!

 

[jdragunas]

hence # 12...

 

[moneyman]

Women are like ...Tangs ..... They are friendly .... but get aggressive when having to compete.
Women are like ...Hermit Crabs .... They always have to search for that perfect outfit.
Women are like ...Lighting ... They are perfect at first, but eventually needs to be replaced.
Women are like ...Salt Creap ... They are nosy, getting into your business.
Women are like ...Cheap Pumps ... They can be loud and obnoxious.
Women are like ...Sail Fin Bleeny ... They can be a mess in the bathroom.
Finally ...
Women are like ...Water Changes ... They are a chore... pain in the rear. But ... gotta live with them

 

[jdragunas]

mine's better... hehehehehehe

 

[darth tang]

Originally Posted by jdragunas
mine's better... hehehehehehe
I disagree, as Money man actually made those up and you just copied yours.
Darth (men are atleast original) Tang

 

[jdragunas]

i didn't say mine is more original... i just said mine is better...
J(men always read too deep into stuff)D

 

[darth tang]

Jd, look something shiny and pretty..........
That should keep you occupied for a while
Darth (women are simple) Tang

 

[moneyman]

She's still looking ...
Money (Women are complicated) Man.

 

[ruaround]

Originally Posted by Darth Tang
Jd, look something shiny and pretty..........
That should keep you occupied for a while
Darth (women are simple) Tang
thats funny darth...LMAO!!!
Reasons why Beer is better than Woman ...
Beer doesn't care how much you earn.
Beer and "ice" don't mix.
Beer won't complain about your choice of vacation--it goes along happily.
Beer doesn't care if you go to sleep right after you've had it.
Beer is happy to ride in the trunk of your car.
Its okay to leave a party with a different beer than the one you brought.
Beer won't drive you to drink.
You can shoot a beer.
ru(mmmm...beeeer)around

 

[jdragunas]

... you know beer is an inanimate object, right?
J(done looking at the shiny thing)D

 

[ruaround]

yes... thats what makes it funny...well to me anyway...
ru(warped sense of humor)around

 

[rberhow]

RU!!!! I thought you'd be on our side after all the love and attention we've shown you this week. Be careful or we may just ignore you......OK, that would make you happy. So maybe we'll just get worse then.

 

[nw2sltfsh]

because I am having an I hate men day today here are some more ......
Men are like......
.....placemats
they only show up when there's food on the table.
.....mascara
they usually run at the first sign of emotion.
.....bike helmets
they're good in emergencies but usually just look silly.
.....copiers
you need them in reproduction but that's about it.
.....bank accounts
without a lot of money they don't generate a lot of interest.
.....high heels
they're easy to walk on once you get the hang of it.
.....curling irons
they're always hot and always in your hair.
.....mini skirts
if your not careful they'll creep up your legs.
.....handguns
keep one around long enough and your gonna want to shoot it.

 

[rberhow]

OMG, way too funny NW2

 

[jdragunas]

lmao, those were great!

 

[jdragunas]

how about this one:
men are like.... a box of chocolates.... you never know what you're gonna get. HAHAHAHA

 

[petieaztec]

jd those were great. and the other ones as well. they are all soo true it makes me cry.

 

[nw2sltfsh]

and some more of my personal favorites....
newborn babies.......
They're cute at first, but you get tired of picking up their crap.
computers.......
Hard to figure out and never enough memory.
power tools......
They make a lot of noise, but it's hard to get them to work.
remote controls.......
Simple. Easy to use. And usually lying around a TV.
road kill.......
They usually just lie around until they start to smell.
pillows.......
Eventually, even the best ones get soft and lumpy.
old car tires.......
Balding, full of hot air, and it never hurts to have a spare.
plastic wrap........
Cheap. Clingy. And very easy to see through.
coolers.......
Load them with beer and you can take them anywhere.
horoscopes.......
They always tell you what to do and are usually wrong.
plungers...........
They spend most of their lives in a hardware store or the bathroom.

 

[johnzo]

Ok....OK.... Guys I wasn't going to post this but