OT-Something about microsoft

naturelover

naturelover

Member
There was a pilot flying a small single engine charter plane, with a couple of very important executives on board. He was coming into the Seattle airport through thick fog with less than 10 miles visibility when his instruments went out. He began circling around looking for a landmark.
Finally, a small opening in the fog appears and he sees a tall building with a guy working alone on the fifth floor. He banks the plane around, rolls down the window and shouts to the guy, "Hey where am I?" to which the man replies, "You're in an airplane."
The pilot rolls up the window, executes a 275 degree turn and proceeds to perform a perfect blind landing on the airport runway 5 miles away. Just as the plane stops, so does the engine as the fuel has run out.
The passengers are amazed and one asks how he did it. "Quite easy," replies the pilot, "I asked the guy in that building a simple question. The answer he gave me was 100 percent correct but absolutely useless, therefore, that must be Microsoft's support office and from there the airport is just five miles due East."
 
naturelover

naturelover

Member
One of Microsoft Network's finest support techs was drafted into the Army and sent to boot camp.
At the rifle range, he was given some instructions, handed a rifle, and a couple rounds of ammo. He loaded the rifle and fired several shots at the target which was fifty yards away.
The report came from the target area that all of his attempts had completely missed the target.
The tech looked at his rifle, and then at the target. He looked at the rifle again, and then once more at the target. He placed his finger over the end of the rifle barrel and squeezed the trigger with his other hand.
The end of his finger was blown off -- whereupon he yelled toward the target area...
"It's leaving here just fine; the trouble must be at your end!"
 
kreach

kreach

Active Member
If Microsoft Made Cars...
A particular model year of car wouldn't be available until AFTER that year, instead of before.
Every time they repainted the lines on the road, you'd have to buy a new car.
Occasionally your car would just die for no reason, you'd have to restart it. For some strange reason, you would just accept this.
You could only have one person at a time in your car, unless you bought a car '95 or a car NT, but then you'd have to buy more seats.
You would be constantly pressured to upgrade your car. Wait a sec, it's that way NOW!
Sun Motorsystems would make a car that was solar powered, twice as reliable, 7 times as fast, but only ran on 5% of the roads.
The oil, alternator, gas, engine warning lights would be replaced with a single "General Car Fault" warning light.
People would get excited about the "new" features in Microsoft cars, forgetting completely that they had been available in other brands for years.
We would still be waiting on the "6000 sux 58'" model to come out.
We'd all have to switch to Microsoft Gas (tm).
Lee Iacocca would be hired on as Bill Gates' chauffeur.
The US government would be GETTING subsidies from an automaker, instead of giving them.
New seats will force everyone to have the same size butt.
Ford, General Motors and Chrysler would all be complaining because Microsoft was putting a radio in all its models.
 
cnlight

cnlight

Member
See that is all very good reasons why to switch to linux. I did and I love it. Well my husband, the computer tech, did.:D :) ;)
 
S

slofish

Guest
LOLOL... good stories. Ever since going to Win XP, ive become a microsoft fan again. Not one problem in about a year. :D
 
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