Question for all you boys out there...

robbin

robbin

Member
So here is the thing...I am tossing around the idea of proposing to my boyfriend of 2.5 years. i know he plans to propose eventually but i really want to be the one to do it. I mean i think he deserves it and why should it always fall on the guy??? Plus i want it to be all about him!
So here is my question for all the boys on this message board. What are your thoughts on you being the one to be proposed to? Would it offend you? I need feedback. So give it to me!
 
yearofthenick

yearofthenick

Active Member
I think that for most men, YES, they would have a problem with it. But you know your boyfriend better than any of us so I think you would be the best judge of that.
I know a couple and the woman holds the door for the man... the woman stands in line while the man finds a place to sit. He's very feminine and she's very masculine. It's clear she makes the calls and he follows them. It's kinda strange for me to watch mainly because I'm the kind of guy to encourage chivalry. He still proposed though.
Also, most of the couples I know have the guys propose because they're usually the last ones on the marriage boat. Most of the time, the girl is ready for marriage loooong before the guy is. Again, I don't know him, but maybe he hasn't proposed because he's not ready.
Lastly, you've got to factor in his friends. If you proposed, he'd probably never hear the end of it from them.
 
robbin

robbin

Member
Lastly, you've got to factor in his friends. If you proposed, he'd probably never hear the end of it from them.
ahhh.. good point about his friends. I never thought of that! See this is exactly why i need feedback. Thanks that is definitely something to consider.
 
stdreb27

stdreb27

Active Member
Originally Posted by zman1
http:///forum/post/2835224
Streb you make me laugh, are you kidding me
- That's not a relationship... That's business!
it makes perfect sense, if you think about it...
Who is chasing who. Typically the guy does the chasing. You almost never see a guy that is better looking than the girl in the relationship, it is always an ugly guy with a good looking girl. The guy is trying to do stuff to keep the girl. Rarely does a girl do stuff to try and keep the guy... Why do you think guys are dragged to ballets and girls are rarely dragged to nascar races?
but in all seriousness. Have you not spoken about marriage already? Typically it is no surprise that you're gonna get married.
 
sman

sman

Member
Everything stdreb27 said was dang near dead on. I have quite frankly no idea what I would say or do if I got proposed to...... I would just be dumbfounded.......
 
crimzy

crimzy

Active Member
Could it be that you want to propose simply because you don't want to wait to get married? I think it is generally understood that proposals, engagements, weddings are really more for the women. If it was all about us then the proposal should probably occur in bed.... after a night of heavy drinking.

However, saving the guy the trouble of buying a ring would save LOTS of $$.
 
olga21

olga21

Member
Its just like wearing a new outfit. If you think you can pull it off then, Yes. If not then no. Its ok to be doubtful but if you have the confidence and can see the relationship being great then go for it
 
deejeff442

deejeff442

Active Member
all you have to do is "forget" to take the pill a couple times and whamo got him.just kidding.are you already living together?if so i would think it would be ok to propose.but if not he might think its a trap .dunno.we have some older neighbors that lived together for over 15 years and just got married 8 or 9 months ago.also how old are you guys?if your only in your early 20"s forget it.
too young .i have been told one of the only reasons people should get married is to have kids.
 
robbin

robbin

Member
Thanks Guys!
Let me break it down for you further.....just to eliminate all of the curiosity. We have been living together for more than a year. Are in our early 30's. both have been married before and plan to have NO children together as we have children from our previous relationships. YES, we have discussed marriage and initially thought we both never wanted to marry again. Over the past year or so we have both brought up the idea of us getting married to eachother. No one is chasing anyone. WE ARE BOTH SMOKING HOT! so not an issue of guy chasing hot girl or girl wanting to keep hot guy! HA!
Anyway, i love this man and i want to build a sloid life with him. We are so aligned with our life long goals and to share a moment with him to make that kind of committment is really what this is all about.
Could i be happy never being married to him? absolutely! do i want to get married for the whole proposal moment, NO..been there done that! its not about anything other than moving forward with our goals and building on what we already have. I know to some of you guys that sounds lame but it's true. We have a great thing and i recognize that. What i dont want to do is

[hr]
that great thing up because i take this leap. Which is why i posted to begin with.
Make sense?
 
spanko

spanko

Active Member
"Could i be happy never being married to him? absolutely! do i want to get married for the whole proposal moment, NO..been there done that! its not about anything other than moving forward with our goals and building on what we already have. I know to some of you guys that sounds lame but it's true. We have a great thing and i recognize that. What i dont want to do is

[hr]
that great thing up because i take this leap. Which is why i posted to begin with."
Not to sound crass but this whole quote put together with the question does not compute to me. If the above quote is correct, why would you want to be the one to propose then? How does moving forward with our goals and building on what we already have connect with could I be happy never being married to him? Absolutely!
It seems to me you want to be married and therefore are bringing up the question to get the reaction from other guys. Only you know your relationship and how you and he feel about traditional marriage, living together, extended families etc.
Just the opinion of one that has been married one time to the same woman for 33 years.
 
deejeff442

deejeff442

Active Member
well then i would say go for it.
i proposed to my wife after dating for only a year and lived with her for a few months.married almost 8 years now.we were in our early 30's also.
we cant have kids which i think makes marrage easier although might regret no kids later in life.got plenty of nephews though.
if all you say is true sounds like a great life for you two.
good luck
 
stdreb27

stdreb27

Active Member
Originally Posted by Robbin
http:///forum/post/2835634
Thanks Guys!
Let me break it down for you further.....just to eliminate all of the curiosity. We have been living together for more than a year. Are in our early 30's. both have been married before and plan to have NO children together as we have children from our previous relationships. YES, we have discussed marriage and initially thought we both never wanted to marry again. Over the past year or so we have both brought up the idea of us getting married to eachother. No one is chasing anyone. WE ARE BOTH SMOKING HOT! so not an issue of guy chasing hot girl or girl wanting to keep hot guy! HA!
Anyway, i love this man and i want to build a sloid life with him. We are so aligned with our life long goals and to share a moment with him to make that kind of committment is really what this is all about.
Could i be happy never being married to him? absolutely! do i want to get married for the whole proposal moment, NO..been there done that! its not about anything other than moving forward with our goals and building on what we already have. I know to some of you guys that sounds lame but it's true. We have a great thing and i recognize that. What i dont want to do is

[hr]
that great thing up because i take this leap. Which is why i posted to begin with.
Make sense?
The next question is he a saltwater whore too?
I guess it really depends on the guy. Personally me and my wife knew we were getting married for some time before I actually proposed. (hey rings cost money) To the point she already had her dress. Personally if she was the one who ended up proposing I'd been in a lot of trouble because she wanted that "moment" I wouldn't have cared.
 
robn70

robn70

Member
Originally Posted by crimzy
http:///forum/post/2835342
Could it be that you want to propose simply because you don't want to wait to get married? I think it is generally understood that proposals, engagements, weddings are really more for the women. If it was all about us then the proposal should probably occur in bed.... after a night of heavy drinking.

However, saving the guy the trouble of buying a ring would save LOTS of $$.

This isn't " What happen's in Vegas" Then again it works in the movies.
 
hlcroghan

hlcroghan

Active Member
It sounds like you guys are ready..............I don't see any problem with you proposing. One question though??? Why isn't this in the Aquarium? lol
 
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