What do you think?

sweetjesus

Member
Well, here is my story:
3 years ago I went back to school via online to get my degree. During one of the classes I worked with a young lady and due to the collaboration on projects I got to know her quite well online. This led to talking to her on the phone. Anyhow, this led to talking to her for about 3 hours a night on the phone for about 6 months. We exchanged photos, yes, you could tell they were real photos. I did have someone do a background check etc etc.
Anyhow, we decided to meet. Only one problem, she lived in New York, and I live in Minnesota.
I started making travel plans, as I was going to visit NYC for vacation to see the statue and Ellis Island etc etc.
Anyhow, one day she just never answered the phone again. Found out through one of my other classmates that she had second thoughts and really was not ready for it because of how "intense" everything was.
Fast forward 3 years. The other night she popped up on my yahoo messenger. I sent her a quick message, hello, hope everything is well with you. Basically just a hey, how are you doing situation.
Well, she messaged me back saying things were fine and wanted to know how I was. Anyhow, she proceeded to tell me how she was a little freaked out about caring so much for someone she met in an online class and sharing so much of her life with that person.
3 hours of online chatting later, she made sure I had her phone numbers to contact her. She actually made me promise to call her the next night.
Last night after 4 hours on the phone, it is like we never quit talking. For the last 2 days we have been exchanging text messages back and forth.
Anyhow, lets just say, she has no regrets about what she did, but some for some divine reason we are back to talking.
She has offered to come and visit and would have been here today if I had said yes.
Or I could go there.
Lets face it, a round trip plane ticket is $230 With non stop, 2.5 hours on the plane, flying there and back in a day is no problem, a lot of executives do this all the time.
So here I am, do I do a day trip rent a car and treat this as a normal date?
I did some online dating when I was younger, but out of all these years and dating and talking to someone there has only been one other person whom I have had so much in common with and who I could really talk to.
We have extensively talked about what happened 3 years ago and I am convinced it was an issue of cold feet.
She is now a professional as am I. Both only one short relationship in that 3 year span, and both still holding a flame for the other during that time.
Opinions and comments please?
 

30-xtra high

Active Member
you probably don't wunna hear this.. but honestly, i think its just isn't how people should date.. i think its unnatural, and a little weird, i'm more of a destiny kind of person.. meaning you should meet somebody in real life, just run into them sometime in your life, now if she came to your house 3 years later.. i guess that might be a little different.., but i don't think you really know her.. i know you think you do.. its just like teen love, when a teen really thinks he loves his girlfriend.. then they break up, and he realizes he didn't love her.., but your choice not mine..
 

sweetjesus

Member
I do not think I know her, I think I do know enough about her to try a date. I am not thinking this is a go out and get married type of thing, but more of a should I give it a first date try type of thing.
 

renogaw

Active Member
My wife and i met through a mutual friend at that friends pary. a year later i was talking with a different friend online. that friend said oh, Wifey is online. i said Wifey who? my friend explained who it was, i hadnt seen her in like 6 months. i sent her an IM, we chatted online for hrs, went out to catch up, eventually fell in love, never looked back.
don't think of it as a date--just go in as if you're just going to catch up on things. If things don't work out then there's no let down (well, yea a little letdown but hey, not as much as if you go in thinking you're going to retire with this person). if things do work out, who the heck cares how you met. it becomes a great story :)
 

renogaw

Active Member
HEHE I just got this email and thought it was fitting:
A little boy goes to his father and asks "Daddy, how was I born?" The father answers: "Well son, I guess one day you will need to find out anyway! Your Mom and I first got together in a chat room on Yahoo. Then I set up a date via e-mail with your Mom and we met at a cyber-cafe. We sneaked into a secluded room, where your mother agreed to a download from my hard drive. As soon as I was ready to upload, we discovered that neither one of us had used a firewall, and since it was too late to hit the delete button, nine months later a little Pop-Up appeared that said:
Scroll Down
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(sigh, the pic didnt come over)
You got Male!
 

lion_crazz

Active Member
Originally Posted by SweetJesus
OH, but I do want to hear it or I would not have asked for thoughts and opinions!
SweetJesus, I say you should go for it. It sounds like you two have a lot of chemistry, and I believe things in life happen for a reason. Obviously, she came back to your life for a reason and I think you should pursue that.
 

shogun323

Active Member
Originally Posted by Phixer
One of the worst things in life is regret. You should do it.
Well said. You need to go for it. Otherwise you always could be wondering, what if????? Good Luck.
 

nigerbang

Active Member
Never can tell..I would prolly go for it...But what to do if she is an Axe Murdering freak..But once again I say roll the dice and give it a try..
 

sweetjesus

Member
Update:
We are continueing to talk, and the subject came to the forefront. The decision was we know a lot about each other but do not know each other. We always said one day ... one day. So I bit the bullet, and said, would you like to get to know each other. Find out. Well, I have a lot of travel coming up in the next couple of months. She has quite a few photo shoots scheduled and some weddings she is in, so we set a date in July. So it appears after not dating for 5 years, I have a date. Now what does one do on a date again?
 

tangman99

Active Member
You did the right thing. The worst that can happen is you meet and decide that nothing is going to come from it and you go your separate ways. There is nothing worse in life when you get older and wonder "what if?"
 

sweetjesus

Member
God, it was going to be a huge what if. 4.5 hours again on Friday! I have to start putting a limit on this as neither of us has gotten enough sleep!
So we took a break on Saturday, and will probably talk tonight. Will have to set the timer and stick to the new rule of limiting our phone time or we will be impossible to work with in the morning!
 

30-xtra high

Active Member
Originally Posted by SweetJesus
Update:
Now what does one do on a date again?
have a good time, make sure she has a good time.. thats all that matters..
 

fishwanabe

Member
My best friend and her "friend" were in the same kind of situation ten years ago. they are now happily married with three kids and one (the last one) on the way!!!
 
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