What would you do?

[andretti]

Here's the deal. I've been reefin' for about 11 years now and have turned many friends and family on to the hobby; I ve also converted a few "freshies." As many of you know, this hobby is very challenging and confusing when one is first starting off. So all of those whom I turned on to the hobby, I also helped them get going, and it was very enjoyable going to various stores and helping others spend their money. Okay...I'll get to the point now. My mother in law :scared:

(yes, she's that bad )wants me to teach her how to do a reef tank.

I've told her time and time again how much TLC and $$$ goes into doing it right. She's seen me many times doing water changes, cleaning the skimmer, scraping off the glass, etc. She assures me that she will get someone to take care of the maintainence, but after a few months of paying $45 per visit (twice a month), she'll think.. Oh I'll just get my son-in-law to do it. I know she will also be a pain about water quality issues, fish compatibility, etc, etc, etc. And when a fish dies (which we all know they will) she'll freak out and blame me. This woman couldn't even take care of a plastic plant. There is no way I'm doing this and my wife said if I do, it's all on me! So I'm curious as to what YOU would do

 

[murph145]

um not do it!!!!
if you already see the potential problems with this lady then i wouldnt do it....
why bother all the pain for such little reward....
if u EVER do set it up for her i would sit down and explain everything to her from the chances of stuff dying to how sensitive a reef tank is and so on.... make her really understand the risks involved in a hobby like this....
but if it were me id say nope

 

[johncombs]

Good Luck, which ever way you go, but I'd say no if I were you! :happyfish

 

[msd2]

Id get her a gift of about 4 reef keeping books and say all I learned is right there. Then explain there are dozens of ways to keep a reef and only she can truly find the best way for her through reading.

 

[mwaraxa]

I do like the book idea. But it seems like your wife even thinks it's a bad idea to help her own mother. And in my eyes the only person you have to worry about pissing off is your wife. So if you have the green light from not to do it then DONT DO IT!

 

[mantis81]

I agree, I wouldn't put my husband through that.

 

[ctgretzky9]

I wouldn't want to be responsible for anyone else's tank, but especially for a mother in law who can't keep a plastic plant alive.
The book idea is perfect. That way youre involved, but not with any life/death situations and the extra work. I find it hard enough to have time to do my own tank, I couldn't possibly imagine another tank.

 

[red79]

Sounds like my mothinlaw. I would for sure say no but as pushy as mine is I would get hounded every time I see her until I finally scream at my husband and tell him to make her stop( like I had to do while making wedding plans MANY times). Good luck!

 

[andretti]

Well, thanks to the co$t of this hobby, I'm off the hook! :jumping:

My mother-in-law went to a fish store and asked what she needed to get going; they quoted her the following: The tank (90 gallon) $247, lights $350, stand & canopy$250, protein skimmer $230, live rock $650, powerheads $200, substrate $80, heater $40, salt $30, test kits $45, hydrometer $10, water condtioners, suppliments, etc $40 which yields a grand total of $2172 And that's with no R/O/ D/I unit, sump/fuge, fish or corals. she said she thought it was only going to be $400-$500 tops. So this is the only time where the price of this hobby worked in my favor! :cheer:

:hilarious :happy: :jumping:

 

[jer4916]

Well first off, i feel your pain, my mother in law...wow...words cant even express how annoying and well...just flat out mean she is...so my condolences there. Anyways deb would most likely say the same things to me...if i were you...i would simply step back and set the situation straight...and tell her how it is...i did it one time with deb, and shes never treated me wrong since.
~chris
p.s buy her a saltwaterfish screen saver. :yes: