California or Massachusetts?

jtt

jtt

Member
My girl and I are trying to figure out whether we should have our wedding in California or Massachusetts. We met online, and Ive moved to Massachusetts to be with her. Im doing the official proposal sometime next month hopefully, but we are already starting to think about the logistics of our wedding... most importantly the location. we have been going over pros and cons all night. If we do it in California, 40 of my friends/family will come and 10 of her friends/family will come, if we do it in Massachusetts than 40 of her friends/family will come and 10 of my friends/family will come. We are really stuck and just CANT make a decision. as for the time frame we are thinking spring of next year. we are also really really broke so it cant be in an overly expensive venue, >100 person guest list.
What are your thoughts?
side note: YearOfTheNick - don't say anything on facebook about us deciding wedding logistics, cause i don't want her/our parents to get freaked out since they facebook stalk.
 
D

dragonzim

Active Member
Since half of your guests would have to travel anyway have you thought about doing a destination wedding or inviting a bunch of people to join you in Vegas or something?
 
jackri

jackri

Active Member
Sounds awfully fast but.... IMO have the wedding where you are planning on living. I hate travel destinations where EVERYONE has to travel to Mexico, etc to go to someone's wedding and eat up extra expenses just for you.
My opinion of course.
 
U

usirchchris

Guest
Has it even been a year yet? Anything less then 3 and you know nothing. You are still in the lust stages...give it five years...wait till you "really think" you know her, then decide. Way harder to cut ties if necessary once you marry, it's a life sentence. If you think you know 100% that this is the one you should marry...this is how you can tell you do not know her...the real dirt takes time
JMHO
If it were me, I would go with Ma, but only because you are already there, and I absolutely hate flying.
 
lovethesea

lovethesea

Active Member
I say you go where you want. Families/friends are great, but it is your day. I loved my wedding, but I REALLY wanted to get married barefoot on a beach. No muss no fuss. Anyone who wanted to come they were welcome. But we were stuck between families. Now almost 19 years to the day (27 years of being together), I still wish we would have done that.
In the end its your day.............
 
jackri

jackri

Active Member
Maybe I'm old school but I think people should get married in their church with their friends and family with a reception to follow..... AND THEN GO HONEYMOON ON THE BEACH.
K, I'll shut up now.
 
reefraff

reefraff

Active Member
If you gave up your home to move to her's I would say the wedding should be in your home state. You will be able to see her friends and family any time, yours not so much so you should at least allow them to be at the wedding.
 
t316

t316

Active Member
I think you start re-directing the wedding plans for another year out. I remember the threads, you just met this girl dude. You probably have not even heard her fart yet. I hate to sound down, but step back for a second before you do this, and really get to know her.
 
loopy101

loopy101

Member
i was just talking about this with a ladie that cuts my grey hair. and we came to the conclusion that the wedding is usually where the ladie grew up or where her family lives. i think generally just for the fact that generally the brides parents pay for the wedding
 
lovethesea

lovethesea

Active Member
did I miss something?
How long have you guys been together? Either way, it is about you and your happieness. Remember this though, if someone is offerering money towards your wedding vs. a house think of your home first. You can still have a church ceremony/afternoon appetizer wedding and still have money to save for your home.
 
bulldog123

bulldog123

Member
I remember you asking if someone here lived in Mass and could hook you up with a place to stay. Look at my SWF joining date. But if its a must let her have her way or you will have to listen to her mouth for the rest of your time. JMO and best of luck.
If she doesnt know yet put it off for a decade or three
Sorry just couldnt stop myself.
 
yearofthenick

yearofthenick

Active Member
I've spent time with them both. JTT is my bro and I've known him all his life. Knowing who he is and seeing them interact with each other has been awesome. I was also very hesitant with such sudden progression in their relationship, but I can say without reservation that she IS his counterpart and this has really been a "perfect storm" for them both. I believe their marriage will work and I'm in full support of it whenever they decide to get married. Go for it, JTT!
Do it in California. How awesome would it be to get married on the strand? We wouldn't have Ted officiate it though... I hope he doesn't show up, though it wouldn't surprise me if he found out and came.
P.S. Have you become facebook friends with Ted? He invited me but I denied him... lol
For those of you who don't know Ted (a.k.a. ALL of you) Ted was my old boss.
 
tang master

tang master

Member
exacltly.lol. i would have to spend long quality time with someone i met online before i married them. i have a freind who recently had his wife whom he met on the internet leave him. she lived in kentucky with 2 kids, he lives in Washington, turns out she married him to get out of that state cause she was broke. just sayin, online relationships are kinda iffy.
 
bionicarm

bionicarm

Active Member
Go with what's in your heart. Whatever makes the two of you happy.
And please don't listen to the idiots here slamming you because you're marrying this girl 'prematurely'. As you have stated, the wedding is a year away. That's more than enough time to get to know someone. Shoot, I got divorced from my first wife in October, 1990. Met my current wife in January, 1991. She got pregnant with our first daughter July, 1991. We got married February 14, 1992. Our first daughter was born March 11, 1992. We've been happily married ever since. And this was before there was anything called Internet Dating or Facebook.
 
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