Let's step back for a second.
Alec, your LFS is lying to you. Many of them do. It's an economics game, and unfortunately the nature of the business for most places -- they know that many new hobbyists are going to get in - and out - of the hobby within about six months time. That's their window of opportunity to lighten your checkbook. Less reputable places -- and I think yours may be one of them -- will basically tell you that ANYTHING is fine.....provided, of course, you're ready to buy it! The fact that your LFS said that all these fish are acceptable in your size tank just reinforces my belief that this place is below the bar. Find a new store.
As Meowzer said, your tank list is far, far above a reasonable limit. So much so that it reminded a few of us of a couple recent trolls. Your comment about eating your aquarium fish....please. I fish all the time. I practice catch and release, and I practice catchitcookiteatit. Still doesn't mean I would eat an aquarium fish. Even a miniatus grouper. Why? Well, realistically -- even if was "giant" for my tank, it's still not much of a meal, now is it?? And your comment about releasing back in the wild is just plain illegal. Sorry if you don't know this, but now you do.
Finally, I have to say that your gripings about members of this forum are not going to get you anywhere. Comments like
"either shut up or give me a respectful answer," and "Im gonna get some hopefully non-sarcastic info on my nitrate spike and then I'm deleting my account.Nothing but bad experiences." don't exactly endear you to the general populace. Honestly, when I read that, my first response was, "Fine, don't let the door hit you on the a$$ on the way out..." and didn't give me any desire to try and help you. Nevertheless, let's look at your stock list.
Saxman and Cranberry have both given you very insightful information about some of these fish. You should listen to them; they are definitely the resident experts about lions and other stinging fish around here. If this was MY tank....I would take out the panther grouper and just stick with the miniatus. Keep the SFE. Get ONE volitans lion, since you know that this is really the fish you said you were crazy about. So...get it! Work your stock list AROUND that fish....even if it means taking somethings back to the store. If you must have a trigger with your setup, you might get away with a blue throat trigger -- they're generally known to be more peaceful. I still would think twice about that choice, however....it may pick at your lion. Instead, perhaps you could consider getting an adult yellow tang (adult so it won't be seen as food for the grouper) or an adult hepatus tang.
And...that's it! I know that four fish (grouper, eel, lion, 1 tang) doesn't seem like much, but trust me -- these boys will get LARGE. Your tank will be in constant motion. And bringing your stock list down to this level will, of course, keep your nitrate from spiking. When you transition to the big tank, that is.
That's it. I'm done. Take the advice, or leave it. Stay, or go. If you stay on, please believe me when I say, "Welcome!" If you sign out for good, well..... you've seen my comment above. Know that I always say it with a smile.