Lets talk about it....farting..

speg

speg

Active Member
My wife said these sweet words to me yesterday "What happened to the guy who was afraid to fart in front of me?"
I don't know why my favorite foods have got to give me the worst smelling gas in the world.. Buffalo wing pretzels....beef jerky.... these things should come with some sort of gas warning on the bag.
and why is farting so funny? I can say the funniest joke in the world....but a simple fart can make people laugh so hard...I'm talkin those hard belly laughs that feel like an ab workout..
and why do we have to smell it when someone farts? The deputy that I did a ride-along with said "ugghh it smells like fart in here" and I instinctively tried to smell it as if it were part of my job.
<-- and is it just me or is this smiley farting?
 
stdreb27

stdreb27

Active Member
Tell her, what happened to the woman who used to dress up every time she would see me...
I don't think farts are the funniest. Maybe a close 3rd behind a friend puking, and the funniest being a friend getting racked in the family Jewels.
 
speg

speg

Active Member
I'm worried that enough people aren't farting by the lack of replies to this. My mom always told me that it was bad to hold it in.
 
speg

speg

Active Member
lol some people on here post on all the silly topics..but when it comes to something real and serious they're nowhere to be found! Farting is alpha and omga people!
 
speg

speg

Active Member
How do you guys feel about lighting farts on fire? Is it legit? I had my doubts, but I did some scientific research on youtube today and I'm starting to believe it's real.
 
speg

speg

Active Member
Originally Posted by stdreb27
http:///forum/post/3296486
Tell her, what happened to the woman who used to dress up every time she would see me...
I don't think farts are the funniest. Maybe a close 3rd behind a friend puking, and the funniest being a friend getting racked in the family Jewels.
My wife read your post... her reply:
"Guy should get slapped.."
 
D

dragonzim

Active Member
Everybody farts
I do have to say the worst thing is that when my dog, who could be dead asleep, lets one go that is so bad that he wakes himself up from it and leaves the room.
 
speg

speg

Active Member
Originally Posted by DragonZim
http:///forum/post/3296612
Everybody farts
I do have to say the worst thing is that when my dog, who could be dead asleep, lets one go that is so bad that he wakes himself up from it and leaves the room.
dog farts are the best!
I had a poodle that had a bad case of the farts...she'd go outside to go potty and bend down to do her thing....she'd fart and it would scare her and she'd run away.....a little while later she'd attempt it again and fart and get scared....I almost died that day.
 
mrdc

mrdc

Active Member
Fiber 1 products give me a lot of gas. It's the chicory root used in the product. No one in this house eats Fiber 1 products anymore.
 
jtt

jtt

Member
Originally Posted by Speg
http:///forum/post/3296602
How do you guys feel about lighting farts on fire? Is it legit? I had my doubts, but I did some scientific research on youtube today and I'm starting to believe it's real.
Its real. Ive lit more than a few farts on fire in high school. burned off some butt hairs while I was at it.
 
meowzer

meowzer

Moderator
Originally Posted by BTLDreef
http:///forum/post/3296661
This thread is hysterical! (and that's coming from a girl!)
me...shaking head....LOL.....
My 1st husband NEVER heard me (you know) My kids still tell me he claims I never have....HAHA....My current husband did once....OMG I was so embarrassed.....I was casting out my fishing pole
.....Something he probably forgot....but me NEVER....and I swear...he will never know again if or when I do....

Some things are better left...UNHEARD
OH....anyone have a PUG DOG...PEEEEUUUUUUEEEEEE...they are the freakin worst
now SPEG.....eat some buffalo wing pretzels....LOL
 
stdreb27

stdreb27

Active Member
Originally Posted by Speg
http:///forum/post/3296604
My wife read your post... her reply:
"Guy should get slapped.."
Another one of my pearls of wisdom. "When a woman slaps you, it means you've made a statement that she cannot refute. And have won the argument."
 
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