Thought I'd Share A Laugh!

darthtang aw

darthtang aw

Active Member
True story.
My family and another family are hanging out by the pool. Their son has a game he plays in the pool where they race to the opposite end swimming...but before the race starts he points in a direction and screams random words to get you to look. So he can get a head start. Keep in mind he is five.
So he is playing this game with his aunt. She is a bigger girl...ok she is a larger girl.....ok she is pushing 400 bills. Contemplated draining some of the pool when she was getting in to prevent to much water displacement.....but I digress.
So her and cody are plaaying the game. She is obviously tired but kids being kids, they are persistant. Cody points...look an airplane. Aunt doesn't look. Look a tree. Aunt doesn't look. Look a boat. Aunt doesn't look. Cody stops and ponders for about 3 minutes. Then a bigsmile creeps onto his face.
He points....and saysss................
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
look......FOOD.
TRUE STORY.
 
darthtang aw

darthtang aw

Active Member

Wow Darth... how did she react?
That is also hilarious.....
She gets out of the pool very angry...comes and sits down and states she doesn't eat that much. Her mom reaches in her purse and pulls out their latest bank statement and says "I beg to disagree" and starts reading it.
3 out of every 4 purchases were for fast food restaurants.
I peed the pool laughing so hard.
 
flower

flower

Well-Known Member
Okay...another true atory.
My children were always well behaved at the restaurant in our old neighborhood. However after dinner as I pay, there was a candy dish by the register...my children would suddenly act like idiots and begin grabbing fistfulls of candy, spilling it over, and acted like they haven't eaten in a month. I was mortified the first time they did it, and scolded them, the second time I was just plain angry, and informed the children if they could never get any more candy from the dish.
Well time passes and we are off to the restaurant once again and before going.... I warn the kids...all three of them that I better not see them so much as reach for that candy dish. After we ate, I told them again as we got up to go and I had to pay.
Well I'm standing there paying, and from the corner of my eye, I see a tiny hand reach timidly toward the candy dish.. I snatch the wrist and Slapped the little hand as I say with each smack What....SLAP did...SLAP I...SLAP tell...SLAP you....SLAP????!!!!
Then with the angriest mommy face I had, I look at the guilty... expecting a crying child....There I was staring into the face of a very small little old lady, that I had just asaulted, I tried to explain but she ran away. Nobody said a word to me, but I was too embarrassed to ever go there again.
 
travelerjp98

travelerjp98

Active Member
Quote:
Originally Posted by Darthtang AW http:///t/387480/thought-i-d-share-a-laugh/140#post_3416910
That is also hilarious.....
She gets out of the pool very angry...comes and sits down and states she doesn't eat that much. Her mom reaches in her purse and pulls out their latest bank statement and says "I beg to disagree" and starts reading it.
3 out of every 4 purchases were for fast food restaurants.
I peed the pool laughing so hard.
Awwww.. I don't even know how to react LOL...
 
travelerjp98

travelerjp98

Active Member
Quote:
Originally Posted by Flower http:///t/387480/thought-i-d-share-a-laugh/140#post_3416912
Okay...another true atory.
My children were always well behaved at the restaurant in our old neighborhood. However after dinner as I pay, there was a candy dish by the register...my children would suddenly act like idiots and begin grabbing fistfulls of candy, spilling it over, and acted like they haven't eaten in a month. I was mortified the first time they did it, and scolded them, the second time I was just plain angry, and informed the children if they could never get any more candy from the dish.
Well time passes and we are off to the restaurant once again and before going.... I warn the kids...all three of them that I better not see them so much as reach for that candy dish. After we ate, I told them again as we got up to go and I had to pay.
Well I'm standing there paying, and from the corner of my eye, I see a tiny hand reach timidly toward the candy dish.. I snatch the wrist and Slapped the little hand as I say with each smack What....SLAP did...SLAP I...SLAP tell...SLAP you....SLAP????!!!!
Then with the angriest mommy face I had, I look at the guilty... expecting a crying child....There I was staring into the face of a very small little old lady, that I had just asaulted, I tried to explain but she ran away. Nobody said a word to me, but I was too embarrassed to ever go there again.
That was an amazing story.. it made me LOL.... it just GREAT... I am so going to share that story with other people if you don't mind... just to funny
 
darthtang aw

darthtang aw

Active Member

Okay...another true atory.

My children were always well behaved at the restaurant in our old neighborhood. However after dinner as I pay, there was a candy dish by the register...my children would suddenly act like idiots and begin grabbing fistfulls of candy, spilling it over, and acted like they haven't eaten in a month. I was mortified the first time they did it, and scolded them, the second time I was just plain angry, and informed the children if they could never get any more candy from the dish.

Well time passes and we are off to the restaurant once again and before going.... I warn the kids...all three of them that I better not see them so much as reach for that candy dish. After we ate, I told them again as we got up to go and I had to pay.


Well I'm standing there paying, and from the corner of my eye, I see a tiny hand reach timidly toward the candy dish.. I snatch the wrist and Slapped the little hand as I say with each smack What....SLAP did...SLAP I...SLAP tell...SLAP you....SLAP????!!!!

Then with the angriest mommy face I had, I look at the guilty... expecting a crying child....There I was staring into the face of a very small little old lady, that I had just asaulted, I tried to explain but she ran away. Nobody said a word to me, but I was too embarrassed to ever go there again.
Bawahahahahhahahahahhahahhahahahhahahahahhahahahahah
That is awesome.....
Could have been worse though
Could have been someone elses kid.
 
flower

flower

Well-Known Member
Quote:
Originally Posted by travelerjp98 http:///t/387480/thought-i-d-share-a-laugh/140#post_3416917
HAHAHA!!! Awesome story, flower + awesome thought about how it could of been anther person's kid, Darth.
I never thought it could be anyone but one of my kids. They were right next to me, and I was expecting them to try for it. Poor old lady, and she actually ran out of the place. She had to be like 85 years old. Any idea how afraid you have to be to run when you're 85?
 
reefraff

reefraff

Active Member
A friend of my grandmother went on a trip from california to Missouri with her son, his wife and 5 or 6 year old son. They would stop for meals and when they were done they would send the boy to the restroom last thing so they would pay the check and go to the car. Different era, you could let a 5 year old go to the restroom by himself and make it out to the car.
So anyway they make it to Missouri to visit the family and on the way back they stopped for lunch. When the check came Grandma was going to pay the tab and realized she had left her purse in the car. She was going to go get it when her grandson offers to pay the bill. They all thought it was cute until he pulls a wad of singles out of his pocket. They asked him where he got all that money and he explained that at one stop after using the restroom he remembered he left his jacket at the table. When he went back to the table to get it is saw money left on the table and took it. After that when he would go the the bathroom he would go check the table and there was almost always money left on it and sometimes there was money on other tables too. In addition to the wad of singles he had a sock half full of change in his suitcase too.
 
flower

flower

Well-Known Member
Quote:
Originally Posted by reefraff http:///t/387480/thought-i-d-share-a-laugh/140#post_3416949
A friend of my grandmother went on a trip from california to Missouri with her son, his wife and 5 or 6 year old son. They would stop for meals and when they were done they would send the boy to the restroom last thing so they would pay the check and go to the car. Different era, you could let a 5 year old go to the restroom by himself and make it out to the car.
So anyway they make it to Missouri to visit the family and on the way back they stopped for lunch. When the check came Grandma was going to pay the tab and realized she had left her purse in the car. She was going to go get it when her grandson offers to pay the bill. They all thought it was cute until he pulls a wad of singles out of his pocket. They asked him where he got all that money and he explained that at one stop after using the restroom he remembered he left his jacket at the table. When he went back to the table to get it is saw money left on the table and took it. After that when he would go the the bathroom he would go check the table and there was almost always money left on it and sometimes there was money on other tables too. In addition to the wad of singles he had a sock half full of change in his suitcase too.
Only little kids.
 
rainbow grouper

rainbow grouper

Active Member
i have to post this
the story of the karate cat
so one day someone brings a dog round our house he comes in and barks at one of my cats and the response jumps up about 4 meters into the air and kicks the dog as he lands
true story
 
reefraff

reefraff

Active Member
When we were kids we had this dog who wasn't particularly found of cats and a cat who didn't particularly suffer canines either. We had a Jack n Jill bathroom where there is a door on each side. One day my older brothers thought it would be cool to lock the cat and dog in the bathroom and let them "work things out". One went to one door with the cat, one goes to the other with the dog. Insert ingredients and shake well.
I've never heard noises like that before or since. They couldn't have been in there for more than a minute. It took my brothers the better part of the day to clean up the mess and another week of extra choirs to work off the cost of the shredded shower curtain. Till the day she died when my mom talked about the incident she said "There were poopy cat paw prints all over the ceiling. How does that happen?"
That cat must have gave as good as it got cause the dog stopped chasing it after that.
 
flower

flower

Well-Known Member
Quote:
Originally Posted by Slice http:///t/387480/thought-i-d-share-a-laugh/140#post_3417114
You mean like this:

This picture reminds me of when my daughter wanted our dog to meet Granny's cat...well Atticus didn't even get a sniff of said kitty...the cat turnd into a ball of hair, like a porcupine as she walked into the room, and in a micro second he leaped from her arms and busted the screen door as he flew through it, not to seen for days after. The dog didn't even know there was a cat in the room and Lena standing with her arms empty wondering what happened...it was just that fast and we had a broken door to show for it.
 
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